ARGH! I need to bring a camera outside! Meanwhile, old pics...

Up the hill, through my windshield. I was trying to give you a perspective on the steepness of the hill, but you can't really tell, can you? Oh, well.

Down a row in the pond block - flags flying. If I ever talk about flagging trees, this is what I'm talking about. The flag colors match up with the fungicidal treatment the trees get.

Tiny Brassica, I think. Cute little baby.

Media (for bacterial growth plates) stirring, from above.

That same media, from the side. Boring, I'm sure, but still - here it is! Yay!

Photo one of an orchid we have here at work. Lovely, lovely thing. This is the second time it has bloomed since I've been here (4 years).

Another shot of the orchid.

Common mullein - fuzzy!

First flower of the season - coltsfoot. I love these guys.

Another view of a coltsfoot - I love them because they're out there in the starkness of March, no leaves, growing out of impossible looking ground. Pretty little things.

*******

Hi there! I've been away awhile. I am tired, just as tired as I was in the last entry. That's ok, though. Tired is good, sometimes. In the past, I often said I was tired when really I was being crushed under the weight of depression. It's actually kind of amazing that I didn't do more than cut myself a few times over the past few years - I was that down. I still continue to be amazed by the fact that I feel kind of normal, and occasionally giddily happy for no reason at all. It's nice, so nice!

If you still read here, and I haven't visited your blog lately, I apologize. I have been so busy, soooo so busy, and also distracted. And also? With regard to what I said above... I have some depression issues at the moment that would normally have had me completely snowed under. Funny - now I know it, which is a good thing. On the other hand, it's kind of scary how life-sucking depression is - if I felt the full brunt of what is scratching through the glass at me right now (all bristly and tooth-baring and angry), I would most certainly be doing very self-destructive things. Thank God (and Shannon, again - I have to keep saying this because she has helped me so much) that I am on medication. It's real, depression, and as I believe William Styron said, the word "depression" doesn't really cover it. Moving on.

The world outside is changing like crazy - so fast, so pretty! I've worked outside a lot lately, which is a total blessing, but I've been way too busy to carry a camera. I need to get out there (hopefully tomorrow) to capture what's happening in terms of bud-break and so forth, because it all happens so rapidly. We have bluebirds nesting in a box in one part of our orchard, and two eastern phoebes claiming territory in two other parts - it's just wonderful. The peepers (frog species) have been peeping like crazy for weeks now - I just adore being outside and hearing them. I can't believe how lucky I am to have this job. It's amazing.

School. I have entered a new era (well, it's kind of an old era for me, but it's new now because it's been absent for too long) - I have become Competitive Anne again. The reason? A 94 on my midterm and a 95 on the latest exam. I'm back in the game, and I want to continue to kick ass. I thank the meds, for sure - I wouldn't be doing so well if I wasn't taking them. I managed good grades before this, but not quite as high - and I don't even know how I did it, feeling as bad as I did. Anyhow, I feel good, and I want to chew up my final and spit it out. We shall see what we shall see, because I am not at all ready for it (two weeks hence). And, per usual, the final skills assessment scares the crap out of me - I perform badly when being watched one on one. Too bad I didn't major in drama instead of science.

Alrighty, then. I wish you all well, and I'm sorry for my lack of presence. I will check in now and then, and I hope to get some photos tomorrow to share with you. Ta for now.