Repeat photo!

Persimmon, last year this time

I do have my camera back, but I need to buy it some new batteries - and so again with a repeat. This fruit is yummy only at certain times - generally after a hard frost. Prior to that, it will shink your mouth down to a tiny, tiny "O" with its horrific tannic-ness.

I went to the city (THE CITY... NYC. still makes me laugh that people refer to it that way, as if it's the only city on earth) yesterday to see "Mama Mia" on Broadway. It was fantastic! I went with two of my coworkers in what was originally to be a goodbye gift, which miraculously turned into a hello, again! gift. Yay! I am still walking on clouds about the extension of my funding. I shouldn't belabor the point, but I will one more time - I love it here. I can't even believe I got this job, and now I get to have it again for another year. It still amazes me. I'm sure I sound like a dork - I often do - but this is such a rare thing that I have. Plant pathology, entomology, horticulture - and people who care about and love those things - it's really quite amazing that I landed here. Those are the things I love, and somehow I got to be involved in it all.

Can you tell I'm feeling happier these days? Much of it has to do with this job extension, but I have been doing better overall lately. I did badly on my midterm last week (I think, but it's hard to tell), but still I'm doing fine. Generally I would be beating the crap out of myself for screwing it up - but I'm ok. I really am! If I f'd it up, I have time to make that up, and I know I will do that. It's so, so nice to feel happy, upbeat, joyful. It's intoxicating! It's a gift. I'm not really sure how I deserve to feel so good, but thank God that I do. It's hard to believe.

I know that I will sink into depths again. I always do. Everyone does. I'm getting better in dealing with it, but I still get self-destructive when I go into the dark, and I dread that. I'm not going to give power to those thoughts, though. I'm going to go outside and do some work with the trees on this absolutely pristine autumn day. Brilliant!

Ta for now.