My dad can still spin me.
I had my annual evaluation at work today, and I was (rightly) chastised for spending too much time online. I do, and I know that, and I was expecting to hear about it. Not looking forward to it, of course, because who wants to be slapped for misbehaving? No one, that's who. Still, though, I was spending too much time online. I talked to my parents about the whole evaluation thing - and you know what my dad said? He said I probably cried to get my way. Excuse me while I say....WTF? Seriously? Cry? To get my way? Because, what, that's the way I handle things? Ever? In my freaking life? I mean, seriously, ever? This is the man I have spent more than half of my life trying to please. A man I have spent years trying to live up to. And he thinks I "cry to get my way"? Fuck that. Fuck it. I haven't been the best employee, but, on the other hand, I am a good scientist, and I am a good employee. And I am keeping a house, going to school, getting good grades, and I am friends with my coworkers. My boss likes me, despite my stupid internettiness. My marriage has been hard, but with the help of my friends, I am dealing with it. And he thinks I cry to get my way? I can't even tell you how much that hurts. I am unreasonably angry about this. I'm sure I'll be fine tomorrow, though, and - lesson learned, right? Pardon me while I punch the wall. Again. I have bloody knuckles from doing it the first time. Ta for now.
3 comments:
Anne, I don't think you're overreacting to be upset. It's a harsh comment that, frankly, I would take as patronizing and a tad sexist if someone said it to me. It's also hurts to confide in someone about something that upsets you and to have someone say something nasty in response, instead of at least empathizing with your feelings or at most defending you. I don't know your dad and don't judge him or his character, so please don't take offense at my frankness. I just want you to know that I understand why you're so upset. Hugs to you.
I would have gone off on him, in a cold and calculated manner, and then just shut off the lines of communication until he apologized, all the while calling him every name in the book a the top of my lungs. I've had to do that once or twice, in a minor way, with my Dad, but he was never that demeaning. Sounds like your Dad needs to grow up in a big way.
I also don't think it was an overreaction. That would upset me too. On top of all you're going through--you didn't need to hear that!
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